Hey you!
How are you doing? It's been too long.
When was the last time you called an old friend that you hadn’t talked to in a long while?
You should do this tonight or tomorrow. Asap.
Because science. (We’ll get to that in a sec.)
Imagine how grateful you would be if one of your best friends from high school called you unexpectedly…so why do you underestimate how much your old friends would appreciate a call from you?
Here’s the scoop: Not only will contacting an old friend you haven’t heard from in months or years make you feel good - your friend on the other end of the phone line WILL BE EVEN HAPPIER THAN YOU.
Lord knows we all could use some positive vibes - and that’s what today’s news is all about - some good news.
You see, old friends appreciate when we reach out to them. More than we think!
According to a new study from the University of Pittsburgh, researchers did several experiments with 5,900 people, looking at the factors that invoke appreciation when someone contacts them. The researchers found that “participants who called, texted, or emailed someone in their social circle just to say hello consistently underrated how much their friend would value hearing from them. Meanwhile, the friend receiving the message placed a much higher value on the surprise social interaction.”
“People are fundamentally social beings and enjoy connecting with others,” explains lead author Peggy Liu, PhD, from the University of Pittsburgh, in a media release. “There is much research showing that maintaining social connections is good for our mental and physical health. However, despite the importance and enjoyment of social connection, our research suggests that people significantly underestimate how much others will appreciate being reached out to.”
In a nutshell: friends love when you call “just because.”
People tend to worry about how someone will react to their gesture of reaching out when it has been a long time since they spoke. According to the study results - you shouldn’t let these worries hold you back.
“I sometimes pause before reaching out to people from my pre-pandemic social circle for a variety of reasons. When that happens, I think about these research findings and remind myself that other people may also want to reach out to me and hesitate for the same reasons,” Liu concludes. “I then tell myself that I would appreciate it so much if they reached out to me and that there is no reason to think they would not similarly appreciate my reaching out to them.”
I’ve already done this a couple days ago and am going to do so quite a bit the rest of the summer. Part of the fun is making a list of old friends who you want to contact.
This news could be filed under “self-care.” For the sake of our mental health - let’s put this study’s findings to the test.
Feel free to call me at 816.260.5754.
You can read the published study in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology.
P.S. Not every piece of news we inspect has to be doom and gloom. ;)